A friend phoned and asked if I was ready for a big ride. Born and set on ready was my reply! My partners are about the same way. Don’t be standing in the way when you ask this group of folks to do something fun or you may get flat run over. We are all in…where we going? Crested Butte to Aspen, overnight in Aspen. “Aspen, Colorado? Where all the Rich & Famous vacation and own their get-away homes, I asked? Movie Star mega! Will they let some weather beaten old cowboys and cowgirls even ride into Celebrityville?” Guess we will find out, my friend replied. I’ll find us a place to stable the horses and nice motel to overnight in, Okay? Well, I went to work and found a nice lady who said she could handle five horses and that there was a lovely hotel next to her place that she would highly recommend for us riders. Got the number and called the lovely hotel. I told the man what we needed and he gave me a price! I chuckled a little and told him I just needed a room for one night. The gentleman on the other end of the line paused a moment and said, “Sir, that IS the rate for ONE NIGHT!” (Long pause) Oh! I guess I felt rich that day so I said, “Alright, here is my credit card number. (Probably why I am not rich because once in a while I feel rich.) The man on the phone taking my reservations said that Valet will assist me in my transportation needs and just give my name to the Bellmen and he will immediately take us to our room, as we are now registered and welcomed. Boy, ain’t this slick, I thought?
We got into Crested Butte (sometimes referred to as crusty butt) in time for dinner. This beautiful mountain ski town isn’t lacking in high class folks either. Wow, for 1.6 we could buy a comfortable home with a view, the Real Estate book said. Gee wiz, maybe we should get two before the price goes up again, I thought to myself. Anyway we all had a good dinner and turned in early in anticipation of a big ride the next morning. Woke up to rain, but before we got to the West Maroon trailhead the sky’s cleared and off we went towards the pass. 12,490 feet high the map says. All I know is that when we got to the top it looked like United’s Friendly Sky’s were below us. Why the whole world isn’t up taking in this magnificent scenery is a mystery to me. Not only the views from the West Maroon Pass but the entire ride makes Las Vegas look bland in comparison.
No hitches occurred along the way and we arrived in Aspen just about the time we had planned. Riding through town was a real treat. Some people stopped and stared, while others snapped photos. A few looked discussed about us riding next to Ferreira’s and Royals Royce’s. I have to confess that I was a little tickled when one of our horses marked the Celebrityville street. I could just hear some eccentric rich car buff telling his chaffer to “Just get it off, GET IT OFF!”
As we got near the stables I saw the sign for the lovely hotel we were going to stay at. A little idea went through my brain and I told the others I’d be right back……meet you at the stables, I said as I rode away. I rode my horse Gold Mine right up to a young man in a white shirt standing next to a sign that said, Valet. Jumped off Gold Mine and handed him the reins. I knew this young guy wasn’t going to tell me he couldn’t accommodate my horse. These guys always smile and say yes for their tips depend on it. “Take him over to that pond and give him a drink, then he’d like a little of your green grass”, I told the young fella. “Sir, that is our Gold Fish pond.” Don’t worry I said, my horse doesn’t like Gold Fish, be right back. Dressed in a pair of leather stove pipe chaps that are more worn looking than Willie Nelsons face, a black felt, boots and spurs, I proceeded to enter this lovely establishment. The Bellman approached me and asked if I was checking in? Mr. Mau I proclaimed, but need directions to your saloon first. “Very good Sir,” he said and led me to what he called the lounge. After I ordered a cool one, the bartender asked if I was here on business or vacationing. Having so much fun with Gold Mine and the fella in Valet, I said business….just doing a little shooting with Bob Duvall for an up coming mini series. “Very good Sir” this guy said too! I was really enjoying this Lovely Hotel. Ever time I said something they replied Very good Sir!” A lot different than back at the ranch when I say something the response is usually, “That’s a dump idea.” The bartender disappeared for a moment then came back and asked if I needed another? Nup, not right now….be back! I went outside to fetch Gold Mine and to my amazement there were at least 50 people taking photos of Gold Mine and then they started snapping photos of me. Gold Mine was knee deep in the pond bobbing for Goldfish. Within seconds a gentleman came up to me and introduced himself as the lovely hotels General Manager. “Anything you need Mr. Mau just let me now personally” as he handed me his card. Well, you know there is something I could use a hand at, I said. Could you get somebody to follow me over to the stables and bring my crew and I back? With one hand motion a big black limousine started moving in my direction. Much obliges, and off I went down the tree bordered driveway entrance riding Gold Mine with the big black limo in hot pursuit. As I neared the stable my “Crew” was a lookin like “What has the boss man gone and done now?”
Introduced myself to the stable lady and said Gold Mine has already had some grass, water and Gold Fish, but he sure could use some grain. With a puzzled look on her face she took Gold Mine towards the barn all the while mumbling something! Told my “Crew” to jump in…you guys are going to like the lovely hotel!
Well, as my riding mates departed the Black limousine at the hotel front doors, more guests gathered around and it was a picture taking frenzy. My riding mates were dumbfounded by the enormous attention we were getting. My little name dropping at the “lounge” was quickly getting out of hand. What is going on? One of my riding partners asked? Reckon they never seen any real cowboys and cowgirls? I think that is it, I replied kinda sheepishly. About that time the General Manager comes up and says if I don’t mind, he’d like to change my accommodations to their Hollywood suite. By now I couldn’t pull the plug on this deal, so I thought I better ride her out and see where the chips fall later. The General Manager personally escorted us to the Hollywood suite and as he opened the door I could see more fresh cut bouquets of flowers than we have in the local floral shop back home. The suite was bigger than my High School Gymnasium and lights I guess they call, Chandlers!” I took the liberty of having the staff bring you a bottle of our finest champagne” my Ol’ Buddy the GM says.
“Will Mr. Duval be joining you later,” he asked? By now my riding pals had the top off the bottle that was in the silver bucket. (Dom something or other) and I was holding this real pretty glass to my lips trying to buy some time as I kept a drinkin. Yes, I replied but Bob is very private and would request not to make a scene. I may just have Bob come in the back entrance if you don’t mind? Very good Sir the GM replied. Would you care to dine with us tonight in our Main Dining Room? Or would you rather have my chef make you a little something and bring it up? Thinking to myself, if I can keep this going til morning we may get outta here with our scalp! If you wouldn’t mind having your chef make us a little something we’d be most obliged. Long day in the saddle. (Tellin the truth now) By the time we finished the magnum bottle of Dom_ _? We got a knock on the door…must be the chef bringing up some snacks. We open the door and in come three carts with more food and desserts than an army could eat. Compliments of the Lovely Hotel the card said! Eat up guys! This maybe our last supper!
In the morning we were up early for our return ride back to Crusty Butt over the East Maroon trail. I went to the front desk and just like the General Manager said all of the additional charges for the suite and meals were complimentary. In anticipation of the celebrity guest’s transportation needs, the black limo was waiting too.
No doubt words spoken in jess can come back and bite a fella. But in this case the Lovely Hotel felt like they had the pleasure of a film crew and a famous movie star and some old common trail riders experienced a small taste of the world of the Rich and Famous!
Fred C. Mau, is owner of Trail Horses of the West
